I was coming out of my local Barnes and Noble when I saw an interesting vanity license plate. It read:
Hate drama. Inside the car was a twenty-something guy. It made me wonder what drama he had endured that made him go to the extreme of getting a vanity plate. Also, I wondered what message he was trying to send current and potential friends.
Is this a warning to potential dates? Is he a victim of one high maintenance girl/boyfriend after another?
How does this relate to breakthroughs?
I think high drama can be a major barrier to success. This is not to be confused with passion or drive. Drama is a disproportionate emotional reaction.
Someone is 5 minutes late - do you flip out?
Someone does not say exactly what you want to hear - do you get moody and pouty?
You don't get what you want - do you make them pay in one form or another?
High drama is really about control - the need to control. And it is often a victim conversation. These are two things that will get in our ways as we tried to make our goals come true.
I would never go to the lengths of getting a vanity plate made up, but I have to agree with this guy.
Many people get passed up for promotions because they are simply too high maintenance. Don't let this happen to you! The tough thing is that high maintenance people rarely get direct and helpful feedback (because coaching a high maintenance person can be very thankless).
Be a poster child of flexibility and partnership.
When I coach someone who creates high drama, the conversation can become quite interesting. I say it like it is! When they get all mountain when the situation is definitely mole hill, I call them on it. Do you work with someone like that? Has anyone been honest with that person?
Most people don't realize the negative affect that being high maintenance can have on their careers. It can be a significant derailing factor.
To achieve more breakthroughs - keep the passion and resolve, drop the drama.