2Weeks2aBreakthrough

Chasing a dream....AKA Harnessing Time Dwindled

I got an email from a friend the other day. I asked him if he wanted to do a freelance project for me and included a PDF of Two Weeks to a Breakthrough since the project related to its launch. It seems that, prior to my contacting him, he had been in a funk - winter blues or something. His words were:

• I'm just now crawling out from under the rock of winter.
• I will endeavor to follow the program and use it to help me jump out of the rut that I've been in lately.
• I think that most of the time, I'm squarely in the stargazer corner of your matrix, but lately I've been stuck in the "stuck" corner. I'm definitely in need of few breakthroughs.

Just a few months ago - last fall - he was excited, optimistic and exploring some new stuff. What likely happened?

Here's what I think happened to him and what I see others struggle with a lot.

• All dream no action.
• All dream wrong action.
• Skewed perception of success.
• Expectations that are misaligned with actions.

I just put up a podcast with Raj Setty over on Management Craft. Raj makes a comment that relates to this struggle. He said something like that we cannot expect to be in the top 1% of success/results if we are doing what only the other 99% of people do.

When I look back at my disappointments in the past, I can honestly say that one of two things are true:

• I did not try hard enough or do enough or do things well enough.
• I had the wrong goal or did not define the goal well.

Sometimes we just need to buckle down and get over all the mind games we play with ourselves and get things done. Get things done!

How much time a day to you let dwindle? By dwindle, I don't mean true relaxation or recreation, which I do not consider to be dwindling. Time dwindled serves no purpose and keeps you from spending the time in a better way. To dwindle means to diminish in size, amount or strength. And when it comes to being goal oriented, dwindling means that you are falling off the chart of productivity.

If you were going to create a pie chart with how you spend your time during the week, what might it look like?

In this example, time dwindled is huge - about 216 minutes per day. If you took just 60 of those minutes dwindled and turned them into focused action, you would be amazed at the results.

OK, you're with me so far, but how should you start? This is another barrier affecting my friend and many others. This notion that we need to spend a lot of time, money, or effort getting ready to start. I suffer from this problem too. I will do many things to get ready - ready - always getting ready.

Here's a tangible example. I have gotten myself in a bit of a pickle. A good pickle, but a pickle none the less. I have too many things going on and I need to get velocity on some things. Here is the short list:

• Consulting client work
• Book due April 1 to the publisher (lots to write yet!)
• Planning my 6 week bike trip
• Two Weeks to a Breakthrough book launch
• My MFA work - reading and writing a bunch
• Getting into shape
• My blogs and podcasts
• A few business books to review
• Home life
• Recreation
• Relaxation

I am sure many of you would create an even more daunting list. It's all important and totally doable if I can harness the time I DWINDLE each day. Or just half of it. Here are a few things I can do to enable myself to harness time I would otherwise dwindle:

• Clarify and identify the next actions needed for all these projects.
• Plan my time and keep the promises I make to myself (also from the podcast with Raj Setty).
• Do something in service of each and every project each and every day. The power of doing small daily actions is HUGE! This is both practical and mental. Doing something every day feels more successful and I won't go to bed thinking, "I didn't get it done today!"
• Reduce distractions - become a super star at saying "no."
• Match up activities with my natural energy cycles.
• Share my goals and get help where possible. Would YOU exercise for me? :-) Only kidding.

And just start - START! Stop dwindling and start doing. Think about the time you dwindle each day and start harnessing it to build momentum and success. That's my plan!

I can name that song in two words...

I like this short post from Mike over at ConverStations called Porch Your Elevator Pitch. In it he encourages us to get to the essence of what we are trying to do. His example:

Elevator Pitch: If Knowledge is Power and Time is Money, think of Content Feeds as a way to gain Knowledge without wasting Time.

Porch Pitch: Gain Knowledge. Save Time.

I think is a good thing to zoom in - like a laser - on the impact you seek. Or the process you want to personify. Or the outcomes you want to produce.

But wait a minute - how does this jive with my earlier advice about setting goals where I suggested ADDING detail? Here's a reminder example from that post:

• Fair: I want to build strength so I can enjoy my trip.
• Good: I am really looking forward to exploring the open road with Hazel, my motorcycle. I have never driven the bike every day for six weeks. I am also looking forward to doing this trip solo and look forward to learning a lot about myself, this country, and the people I meet. This trip will require planning and preparation, including ensuring that I have the upper and lower body strength needed to enjoy daily rides of 3-5 hours. I do not want to be in constant pain or need to take breaks every 30 minutes. To prepare, I am going to increase my weight training and build my strength - especially in my back and upper body.
• Great: I am really looking forward to exploring the open road with Hazel, my motorcycle. I have never driven the bike every day for six weeks. I am also looking forward to doing this trip solo and look forward to learning alot about myself, this country, and the people I meet. This trip will require planning and preparation, including ensuring that I have the upper and lower body strength needed to enjoy daily rides of 3-5 hours. I also want to have the energy needed to spend afternoons and evenings talking with and connecting to people. I do not want to be in constant pain or need to take breaks every 30 minutes while riding. To prepare, I am going to increase my weight training and build my strength - especially in my back and upper body. I am going to take on living strong each day - eating foods that make me strong, and organizing my day to show priority for building strength. And I will value little, directionally correct actions like taking the stairs instead of the elevator and adding one more set to my weightlifting regimen. Little is big. A day lived strong is a good day. Each week I will reflect on my progress and celebrate strength.

Here's the distinction of where and how to use these expressions of desire (Does this word "desire" strike you as odd here? Our goals are our desires - or they should be on the level of a desire.). The essence of my goal above, what Mike calls the porch pitch, is simple - be strong. This is a great rallying phrase for me to repeat and on which I can focus. For this two word mantra to mean anything - for it to have the same hair raising, chilling impact as the long version, the long version must exist. Until we connect with our goals on a sensual level - smell, touch, sight, sound, and taste - the mantra will be hollow - just a pretty package. Going through the work to create amazing goals facilitates this connection process.

But once you have the connection the mantra is like a big wad of crisp 100 dollar bills - as good as the gold they are supposed to represent (I know, the gold is not really there any more, but you get my point).

The Delight in Me Greets the Delight in You

Delight: to please greatly, charm, enchant, captivate, entrance, thrill; gladden, gratify, appeal to; entertain, amuse, divert; informal send, tickle pink, bowl over. (From the Apple dictionary)

This world is made up of one energy field - you are in it, I am in it and how we each feel affects the other. Even more so when the proximity is close.

Have you noticed that children light up when they are around others who are entranced with play? As adults we learn to contain ourselves, but the feelings still occur.

People delight in our delight! And when we are curmudgeons, that rubs off and permeates the air too.

Delight - it's voluntary and free. Available to everyone - right now.  We can solve problems and express delight. We can deal with serious matters and feel delight. We can parent, coach, mentor, teach, and even manage and feel delight.

The energy you share and evoke is powerful.

Delight is gratitude with a light heart.
Delight is  the joy of contribution.
Delight is humble pride.
Delight is accomplishment.
Delight is not being afraid to show your glee.

There's a TV commercial for a major cruise line, I don't remember which one. The story in the commercial is a mother talking about how her kids never smile, but then as the cruise unfolds, they start to smile.

We do this all the time, don't we? We stop ourselves from smiling - from being grateful, thankful, happy, and content. Why do we do this? Have we defined positive energy - optimism in action - into a sign of weakness?

I think it's a sign of strength - that we care enough and are strong enough to be delightful. Do you endeavor to be delightful? What if you said, for the next week, that you want to be perceived as delightful.

Oh, it won't hurt. I will try it if you do. I will admit that I have a brooding artist inside me and that I have been known - on occasion - to feed off dark energies. Here's the thing - life it too short to brood and most of us are way too fortunate to deserve to brood. It is rude and disrespectful to be dissatisfied and at the same time prosperous.

Five ways to be delightful today:

1. Smile. Don't worry about getting wrinkles or that your teeth are yellow. Your smile is beautiful because it expresses your best side.
2. Play. Show your kids - your significant others - your friends - your most playful side. They will delight in your delight.
3. Show appreciation every day.
4. Don't sweat the small stuff - and as the book says, it's all small stuff.
5. Become a delight catalyst. Brighten up your office and home. Be the one to take the initiative to enjoy and spread joy. Demonstrate partnership, forgiveness, tolerance and curiosity. refuse to let the report eating copier or the overly-talkative coworker get you down. These things are small potatoes and one reason why life is such an adventure.

Don't wait - start right now. Be happy.

Delight provides fertile ground for breakthroughs.

If Then - Engaging in Communities and POW!

I like this post from Seth which asks, If no one reads your post, does it exist? It's a good question and Seth basically suggests that the act of writing a blog changes us - we approach the message, our notions about power and control, and our thoughts differently. I agree - blogging has certainly changed me.

And there is something wonderfully mysterious about blogging, too. Sure, when I push this "publish" button, I know that some number of subscribers will have access to this post - and some might read it if I can capture their attention and trust. Then it lives on in Google land and all the other wanna be lands. Someone two years from now might read a post that impacts his or her life. That's cool and it also makes my blog posts very important to me.

When we put stuff out there - it's out there and that changes us and the world in some small way. And you know what I think about small things.... POW! big result.

And I think this same concept applies to many things. The act of getting out there and engaging in a meaningful way with a new community changes you and the community. Volunteering for an organization, working with your professional organization. Volunteering to work the Iditarod dog sled race. Going back to school.

We engage in communities and things happen. Online communities, local communities, international communities. One time event based communities, long term membership communities.

We enter a new context and POW!

We can also experience changes by deepening our involvement in a community. For example, going from casual volunteer to board member, from blog lurker to blogger, from commenter to author.

Are you a player or a spectator? If you play, it's a way different experience. Things happen - some right away, and some things might not happen for a while.

Things percolate.

Connections become connections becomes connections.

One thing leads to another and then !!POW!!

Make Reverse Requests to Generate Breakthroughs

If you are a reader of this blog or my book, you know that I am a fan of making requests to generate breakthroughs. Well, here's a different twist - the reverse request.

What's a reverse request? A reverse request is what happens when you help others make requests. It can look and feel a few different ways:

1. You know what someone wants and you offer it (or some version of it).
2. You engage in a conversation that helps someone articulate what he or she wants. Then you ask what you or someone else could do that would be most helpful.
3. You provide the courage - courage on loan - that helps someone else make something big happen.

I have a pal who is very conservative when it comes to being assertive about her hopes, dreams, and wishes. She does not want to be a bother and feels a bit selfish to ask (I am not putting words in her mouth, we have talked about this).

Here's the thing - it's not selfish to make requests, because when we are at our best everyone wins. Anyway, that's her struggle and she never asks. Every now and then, I put myself in her shoes and share what I think she would ask if she had the courage. I have been right, I offer the help, she says "yes" and things surge forward for her a bit. You have a friend like this too and you can do the same.

Here's another example - totally true. When Bill and I decided to get married, I asked him a question that changed our lives. Here's the question:

• If you could live anywhere and be doing any kind of work, where would you live and what would you be doing?

I love this question and recommend that you ask your significant other this question tonight. Bill said he'd like to have his own consulting company (he's a geologist) in Seattle. We lived in New Mexico at the time. My response - "why don't we do that," and the rest is history. We have been living in Seattle for 8 years and his consulting business is thriving. This conversation put focused actions into motion. I got a job at Amazon.com (I needed a real job while he took time to build his company) and four weeks after we got married the relocation began. Bill resigned from his stable state job he had held for 10 years. We dove into the unknown.

Here's the funny part - I had never been to Seattle before we decided to move there - never been to the northwest. It did not really matter because I could see this was a dream of his and I had confidence he would not be attracted to a lousy place. The first time I touched Washington soil was for the interview with Amazon.com.

Would we have moved to Seattle one day anyway? Perhaps, who knows. Did it happen much more quickly because of the reverse request - absolutely. Here's the point - Bill had it in his head, probably for years, that he would like to live and work in Seattle. Your friends and family have dreams too, and I bet some would surprise you.

When you can make something BIG happen for something else - BAM! - that's cool and feels great.

Proofing this post, I am sensitive to the fact that this may seem like a pat on the back for me - please, don't take it that way. We can all make a big difference by using reverse requests. I like to share my real life examples to make the concepts more concrete.

Reverse requesting is a tool we can use to help catalyze breakthroughs - it's a way we can help and serve others.

Amazon Shipping Two Weeks to a Breakthrough

Ever the speedy one, Amazon.com has started shipping Two Weeks to a Breakthrough. It's funny, I just got my copies direct from the publisher today and my "first copies" last Friday. The "official" publication date is not until March 2nd. Speed - fast - woo hoo!

Which is more important - the process or the outcome?

I had to catch myself yesterday. I fell into a bad trap that I think trips up many of us - a failure to acknowledge success and results.

I was away last week and got home yesterday. As I was going through my mail, I came upon a package from my publisher, Jossey Bass (Wiley). In the package were the first two copies of my book, Two Weeks to a Breakthrough. I spent 30 seconds strumming through the book then put them aside. Later, at about 10pm, I looked at them and realized what I had done. I was amazed at the lack of glee I felt when I first saw the books - in the flesh. I then spent more time seeing the book differently, as something precious and wonderful. Quite a different experience.

But we do this all the time, don't we? Life is like a marathon and we keep running. Once one thing is "done" it is gone from our psyche even if the results won't be felt for days, months, or years. My lack of awe at seeing the first copies of the book (which I wrote over a year ago) highlights why we find it tough to stick to exercise plans - unless the connection between action and results is close in time, we devalue both. Instant gratification rules.

I believe that the present - the process of generating the here and now - is what determines our happiness and success. So the process is paramount.

And yet, it is important to reflect on and feel joy for our accomplishments too. Gratitude can apply to the present, the past, and even the future. It's part of our daily process that acknowledges the outcome.

We will generate more and better breakthroughs when we can forge strong connections between today's efforts and tomorrow's fruit - even if the fruit is unknown. How do we do this? How can we live a long term life of alignment each day?

First, I think we need to define our intentions and goals with this in mind. For example, I am working on building strength so that I am able to enjoy my 10,000 mile motorcycle journey in May and June. I can express this goal in a few ways:

• I want to build strength so I can enjoy my trip.
• I am really looking forward to exploring the open road with Hazel, my motorcycle. I have never driven the bike every day for six weeks. I am also looking forward to doing this trip solo and look forward to learning a lot about myself, this country, and the people I meet. This trip will require planning and preparation, including ensuring that I have the upper and lower body strength needed to enjoy daily rides of 3-5 hours. I do not want to be in constant pain or need to take breaks every 30 minutes. To prepare, I am going to increase my weight training and build my strength - especially in my back and upper body.
• I am really looking forward to exploring the open road with Hazel, my motorcycle. I have never driven the bike every day for six weeks. I am also looking forward to doing this trip solo and look forward to learning alot about myself, this country, and the people I meet. This trip will require planning and preparation, including ensuring that I have the upper and lower body strength needed to enjoy daily rides of 3-5 hours. I also want to have the energy needed to spend afternoons and evenings talking with and connecting to people. I do not want to be in constant pain or need to take breaks every 30 minutes while riding. To prepare, I am going to increase my weight training and build my strength - especially in my back and upper body. I am going to take on living strong each day - eating foods that make me strong, and organizing my day to show priority for building strength. And I will value little, directionally correct actions like taking the stairs instead of the elevator and adding one more set to my weightlifting regimen. Little is big. A day lived strong is a good day. Each week I will reflect on my progress and celebrate strength.

Do you see the difference? Now that I have created this, I need to print it out and read it each morning to get reconnected with my goal!

I also think it is important to see results as process steps in our larger goals. The finished book is a part of my overall goal to be a breakthrough catalyst - it's a tool. Your job promotion is not an outcome, but another process step in your larger career goals.

May of us, me included, have so much to celebrate. Do we celebrate? And I don't mean bringing in a box of Krispy Kremes - although that's nice too. I mean celebrating in our own minds. Taking the time to see and be blown away by what we are doing. Taking the time to see and be blown away by what others are doing.

1. Make two lists. The first list is five personal accomplishments you should take time to celebrate. The second list is five accomplishments of others you want to acknowledge. Celebrate and acknowelege.

2. Reimagine your goals with the daily process and celebrations in mind. Read and connect with these each day.

3. Notice and prevent yourself from letting your busy day get in the way of seeing and feeling success.

Exordium

Exordium: Beginnings to a dialogue.

The breakthrough equation: 1+1 = 975

Delightfully nagging questions.

We cannot admire what we don't understand.

Vision + story + way =

One cannot conceive of a future one has no part in planning.

Adrenaline can be voluntarily produced.

What would happen if you risked absurdity?

Happy V-Day!

(Photo courtesy of www.istockphoto.com)

Express love - see love - notice the love - in all things today. Transformational meetings, extraordinarily dedicated employees, outstanding products, friends, flowers, flow, saxophone solos, street performers, juicy ripe pears, smiling dogs, humming copy machines, short lines at Starbucks, unsolicited assistance, on-time anything, and your loved ones.

Risk and Revelation

I’m attending school this week – part of my MFA program at Goddard College. I am in my second of four semesters that begin with a week of residency in Port Townsend, WA. During these residency weeks we cram our heads full of ideas, inspirations, and fears, then give them voice and flesh on 125 pages submitted in five packets of work throughout the semester.

The theme for this semester’s residency is “risk and revelation.” These are two elements important for generating breakthroughs, too.

As one of the keynote speakers, Rebecca Brown, reminded, most of us don’t have to take the kind of risks that endanger our lives. We don’t write – or work, or play – in fear of being tortured or thrown in prison.

The risks most of us take are scary in a relatively safe way.

Being here with 70 talented writers is scary for me. And safe. The community is supportive, nurturing, and largely nonjudgmental.

Risks, even the tame kind, can facilitate growth. They expand our comfort zones by making us very uncomfortable.

One of the other speakers encouraged us to acknowledge the unseen and felt that we often know the unseen, but choose not to see it. It’s all inside and right under the surface skin.

Another speaker said that she writes her obsessions. She does not choose that about which she will obsess – it chooses her. I understand this, don’t you? Think about the topics, causes, movements that occupy your mind and sparks your energy and passion. How did that all get started?

As a writer, I fear being perceived as redundant and irrelevant. I am a bit obsessed by the desire to be interesting. This started very early in life. I was the baby of four children, the next sibling being seven years older than I. I grew up competing for attention with two parents, a sister, two brothers, and all their friends. They were all so much older and talked about older people things. My kiddy stuff was not nearly interesting enough but when I made the effort to talk like they did, I got some attention. I remember my first solo purchase – from a garage sale at the Russell’s house half-way down my street, Mikado Court – a third year German language text book. No, I did not speak German, not a word. But it seemed like an intellectual book to me and I thought that if perhaps I could speak few German words, they would pay attention to what I said.

This is not a sad story. Sure, I had to fight for airplay when I was young, but this obsession made me a voracious learner and for that I am still grateful. As a 40 something blogger and writer, the obsession with remaining relevant fuels my drive to learn and grow.

I like the notion of writing my obsessions and I like the parallels all this has for generating breakthroughs in other aspects of life.

Stepping into risk to create a revelation can start with an obsession or passion or fear – it almost always is a factor, anyway.

Just a sidebar: I don’t want you to think I am suggesting that people who obsess about destructive things like murder and rape ought to act on them. This post, and all the posts on this blog, are directed toward people like me and you who are trying to blow the lid off our fears and make positive contributions. Breakthroughs, generated with some risk, allow us to better our world and ourselves.

I have mentioned this before. There is a saying, “go where the energy is.” The energy can be an obsession, fear, passion, or some other driving force.

What’s at the seat of your energy?

If you were going to spend more time each day working from your obsessions, what would you be doing and how do this differ from what you did yesterday?

What’s the risk you must take to experience revelation?